Fragile State of Mind
by PrettyReckless11792
Summary: REVISED VERSION. He was rude, cocky, arrogant,stubborn, loud and in your face 100% of the time. But somehow Ria Daniels fell in love with him. DEADLIEST CATCH, Jake Harris/OC.
1. Jacob Harris the tease

**Hey ya'll. So this is actualy the very first fic I've ever written and will always be the closest to my heart. This is a revised version from my old account, so before anyone accuses me of copying it...there ya go. I decided to revise this story beause I love Ria and Jake, and their both very special to me, and the original fic sucked to be honest. I didn'tt ake much time to correct errors or fix things. I also tweaked the story line to fit my original plan for this story. I really hope ya'll like it.**

**AND I won't be abandoning She makes me beg either so don't worry. An update on that story will out sometime today.**

**Ria Daniels and Jake Harris have been bestfriends since as long as they could remember. Through everything they've been the constant in eachothers lives. But Ria loves Jake as more than just a friend, and as King Crab season starts Jake's feelings for her start to change. Will Ria and Jake make things work, and finally be together? Or will the very love that they have for eachother tear them apart?**

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><p>Ria Daniels sighed and downed the shot of Whiskey in front of her, relishing the burn as it traveled down her throat.<p>

"Oi. Easy on the Whiskey darling."

She turned miserably to face the man who had spoken to her.

Joshua Harris was eyeing her knowingly over his beer bottle.

"Josh. It's my first shot."

"Yeah...but with you one shot turns into two, and two turns into ten."

She quirked an eyebrow at him, and scowled " You sayin I got a drinking problem?"

"More like drinking disease..."

She waved him off " Drinking shminking." Then she gazed darkly acrss the smokey, dimly lit Elbow Room, her gaze saddening. Josh rolled his eyes and grimaced.

Ria was one of those girls who stopped traffic. They type who entered the room and made every girl take a hit of her self conciousness. Her long pale hair fell in thick silky waves down her back, falling in a casual elegance around her face. She was tiny, her curvy toned body complete with several pieces of artwork including elaborate half sleeve and several piercings. What took peoples breath away was the eyes. Large, and blue grey, framed in thick black lashes they bored into yours often sending shivers down Josh's spine. They could be laughing and dancing one moment, and blazing with anger the next.

Right now however...

They were just plain sad.

Josh shook his head. Here she was, one of the most beautiful girls he had ever seen and she was moping over his stupid ass little brother.

Typical.

Jake was across the room chatting up a leggy brunette who's chest was practically falling out of her two sizes too small top.

" That boy is never gonna learn is he?" Josh glanced over to Freddie and shook his head.  
>" It's been 21 years...Why would he start now?"<p>

Since Ria was old enough to know the difference between like and love she had been head over heels for Jake. And now at 21 years old, nothing had changed for Ria, and nothing had changed for Jake. She was still pining and he was still clueless.

Freddie nodded morosely and patted Ria's hand. She stood with a sigh and shruged into a jacket.

"I'll be on the boat if anyone needs me." She stole one last glance at Jake, pursed her lips and dissapeared through the crowd. Josh ran a hand tiredly over his face.

The fact that Ria was in love with Jake was common knowledge.

And Josh just didn't get it.

Jake was rude, cocky, loud and a definate 10 on the douchebag scale.

But somewhere in all that Ria found something to fall in love with.

Josh had clung to the hope that she would grow out of it and realized how foolish it was to think she and Jake would live happily ever after, but much to his dismay her adoration for the younger harris had only deepened over the years.

In simplistic terms.

Ria was fucked.

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><p>The cold seeped through Ria's clothes as she exited the bar, and night became silent around her. She walked quickly wanting to be anywhere but Alaska at that moment.<p>

"Yo Ri!"

She half turned, not expecting the voice that had called out to her.

Jake was jogging up to her, beer bottle in one hand lit cigarette in the other. She frowned.

"Are you leaving?" He shook his head, and threw an arm roughly around her.

"No and neither are you. It's only 9:30!"

She wrinkled her nose as the alcohol radiated off him, and the smell entered her nostils. "You smell like a brewery."

He ignored her, and steered her back up the steps, his arm sliding off her shoulders and intertwining his fingers with hers, sending heat waves through her body.

And as if he hadn't made her night a living hell already he puled her down on to his lap before she could object.

She spotted Josh, who's eyebrows were raised so high on his head they were in danger of dissapearing into his hairline. She excused herself from Jake, and hurried forward ducking around people.

"What the hell?" Josh hissed when she appeared at his elbow.

She averted her eyes "He's drunk Josh...It..it doens't mean anything."

But to Ria it meant a whole lot.

Before Josh could respond to her, a guy slid easily in between them. He was scruffy, somewhere in his late thirties or early forties, and definately a fisherman josh noticed as he clocked the deck boots. He grinned at Ria.

"Hey sugar. Buy you a drink?"

She flicked her gaze to Josh, then back to the man and smiled politely.

" No I don't think so-"

"Awe come on." He said, smile turning nasty "Don't be like that." He advanced on her, forcing her to take a step back.

"Hey man she said she wasn't interested."

The fisherman turned to Josh as if noticing for the first time that he was there.

"Was I talking to you?"

Anger bubbled in the pit of Josh's stomach, as the scruffy man turned back to Ria nasty smile spreading across his face. "So how bout it?"

"What're you fuckin deaf? The lady said beat it."

Ria glanced nervously over to the Captains table and saw that Edgar was the only one who had noticed to heated exchange, and was watching closely.

The nasty smile on the guys had long since faded, and was replaced by a glare as the man turned back to Josh.

"Heyy asshole, why don't you take your beer and go back to your boys."

"There a problem over here?"

They turned to see Sig, who had appeared quite literally out of nowhere, face smooth but eyes hard as he looked between the three of them suspiciously.

"No sir." the scruffy man replied, giving him a mock salute "Me and the lady was just leavin" He grabbed Ria by the arm pulling her flush to his side.

"Get your hands off of her right now."

Jake was pushing people out of the way as he stormed through the bar, chest puffed out like a balloon, anger etched all over his face. He looked crazed for a moment, his hazel eyes huge in his head, and glittering with malice as he got less than three feet away and promptly pitched his beer bottle at the guys feet shards of glass and fizz spraying everywhere.

"What the fuck bro?" The guy said jumping backwards. His friends had slowly begun to creep forward realizing their scruffy counterpart was in need of some assistance "She's just some bar slut-

But whatever else the guy said was lost as Jake fist flew in the general direction of his face, and an all out brawl started in the bar.

"Jake!" Ria screeched, jumping forward to wrench one of the guys off his back, but was stopped prematurely by Freddie. He shook his head.

"No sweetheart. You stay here."

Jake Anderson and Ryan came flying out of nowhere and started pushing and shoving in order to get two of the guys off Jake as he struggled to get a grip on the scruffy guy his fist connecting several times with the guys face.. Ria was watching the fight anxiously, when she felt a rough tap on her shoulder. She turned to find a girl, several inches taller than she sneering down at her.

"Keep your fucking boyfriend on a leash bitch."

" Tell your animal to keep his hands to himself and get out of my face." She spat turning away from her. The girl grabbed Ria by the left arm, and on instinct Ria turned swinging her fist and caught the girl right on the eye socket as she grabbed at Ria's hair. They fell in a screaming tangled heap, Ria on top punching wildly until she felt the sickening crunch of the girls nose beneath her fist.

" All right I think you made your point. You made your point!" Freddie yelled prying Ria off the girl and puling her backwards as she fought to get free. Several fake fingernails, strands of blonde hair, and blood from the girls broken nose and a small cut above Ria's eyebrow were on the floor.

"Easy Pitbull." Jake said, grinning at her who even after being in a bar fight looked effortlessly perfet and was smiling at her as he examined the cut above her eye. She absently dashed at the blood which had trickled down her face.

"Bitch got what she deserved." Ria said, leaning around to watch the girl clutch at her face, blood ozing between her fingers.

"Alright kiddies." Phil said, eyes twinkling "Let's head home before we all end up in the clink...Again."

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><p>By the time they got back to the boat Ria's head was pounding from the fight, the alcohol, and the stress over Jake. She opted out of hanging out in the galley and went to shower instead. As she exited the bathroom, the guys had started a rowdy game if cards, and she could hear several accusations of cheating being yelled.<p>

She was more than suprised to find Jake lying back on his bunk, when she entered the state room. He grinned at her, and patted the bed next to him. She walked slowly over and crawled very awkwardly, careful not to touch him as she manuvered herself over him. She tensed as she laid down, and she was sure he could hear her pounding heart through her chest. He reached an arm out blindly in the dark and slid it over her waist, fingers leaving a trail of goosebumps the small of her back as he grazed her skin. He sat suddenly and pulled his shirt over his head, and then settled back down next to her facing only inches away. She stared at him for a long moment. It would be so easy to end things right here and now. All she had to do was lean slightly forward and...

But she pushed herself away from him, and closed her eyes listening to the sound of his deep breathing, with only one thought on her mind.

_I hate you Jacob Harris._


	2. More than anything

**Waddup Chapter 2? So I'm not getting any reviews to let me know what you guys think about the revised version. Please leave me some feedback.**

**AND show JakeHarrisLover some love on her story The World has it's Shine. It's awesome and all about pissing off Keith;)**

**Enjoy my loves!**

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><p>Ria awoke the next morning and knew she wasn't alone.<p>

She was curled into Jake's body, his arm still resting across her waist, dead to the world. She propped herself up on one elbow, and gazed down at him smiling slightly. He looked so young when he slept, his features a smooth lineless mask. As she slid out of bed she could feel the aches, and pains and knew she had a black eye. She grimaced when she saw her reflection. She was sure the girl with the broken nose looked much worse than she did, but she wasn't exactly looking fresh off the catwalk either. She winced with each step, as she walked to the kitchen, poured herself coffee, and slid daintily into the galley.

After a few moments the guys had trailed out of bed one by one.

"Nice shiner." Ryan said, grinning at her from the doorway. Freddie chuckled, as Jake and Josh both exited their room, yawing from sleep, Jake still shirtless. Ria's stomach did a small flip flop as he stopped when he saw her.

"Whoa." He said leaning down to look at her face. She grimaced.

"Kinda hott." He said, eyes twinkling.

She grinned and touched her swollen purpley eye gingerly

"Thanks. It's what I was going for."

He laughed and shook his head, and she went back to her coffee.

It was going to be a long day for Ria Daniels.

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><p>After her shower and cover up job that really didnt help her swollen black eye, Phile sent her, Ryan and Josh out for groceries. It was a chilly windy day, and dark clouds churned restlessly on the horizon. After fighting to get a parking spot, Ria finally snagged one nearly making scrap metal out of a tiny honda, after it tried to go against Jake's big red Ford pickup and lost. The store was crawling with fisherman and their crews, and the over worked employees had resolved to just putting moving carts of extra supplies out instead of bothering to restock the shelves.<p>

Ryan split from Josh and Ria, as they went down the soap aisle. Once Ryan was out of earshot Josh cleared his throat loudly.

"So...How'd you sleep?"

She rolled her eyes, and continued down the aisle "Fine Joshua."

"Comfortable?" He asked, grinning impishly as she turned to face him.

"What?"

"Ya'll looked pretty cozy to me." He said slyly waggling his eyebrows. She tried for a moment to be angry, but then they both burst out laughing. Her laughter soon subsided into a sad sigh.

"Oh Josh" She asked, resting her head on his shoulder. "What am I gonna do?"

He patted her on the back "You really love him don't you?"

"More than anything."

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><p>The ride home was slick and icy, and Ria swerved around the road avoiding the thick patches of ice and snow, and successfully made Ryan shriek like a girl. Josh fell into hysterics, causing Ryan to go bright red and slug him in the shoulder, and before Ria knew it they were waging an all out war in the truck. After narrowly avoiding a fist...twice, Ria slammed on the brakes, and threaten to make them both hitchhike. They switched to arguing about who won.<p>

Boys.

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><p>Phil sat in the Wheelhouse, watching the boys work. He smiled as Ria pulled up to the dock, and slid out of the truck, wind whipping her long pale hair around her face. He watched as Jake blew her a kiss, and she waggled her fingers back at him.<p>

Phil couldn't remember a time when those two weren't attached at the hip. Sure they bickered like an old married couple and the fights were explosive but at the end of the day, they loved eachother.

In more way than one.

Phil wasn't blind. Ria stared at Jake like he was the sun, and she needed him to survive. How his son couldn't see that, Phil would never understand. When they had been little kids, Phil would joke with Ria's mom and dad that one day they would grow up and fall in love. That she would become Lyrica Harris one day.

But that was just a joke...

Right?

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><p>Jake huffed and threw himself into a leather wannabe chair, in front of the fitting room. Why he had volunteered to take Ria shopping he would never know. Shopping with her was like watching grass die. Finally she came out in a pair of deep blue jeans, and pirouetted in front of the mirror. Jake eyeballed her open mouthed.<p>

"What do you-What?" She asked, frowning as she caught his expression.

"Do you ever eat?"

She put her hands on her hips, and pulled a face at him, eyes flashing.

"Yes I do, for your information."

He scoffed, raising an eyebrow " Coulda fooled me. You look like an Atheopian."

"That's an Ethiopian Jacob."

"Same difference."

"Not really."

"Whatever you say skeletor."

Jake ducked as Ria grabbed a metal hanger and whipped it at his head.

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><p>Jake may have been the worst driver Ria had ever had the misfortune to drive with.. And she had driven with Josh many times. In between fiddling with his lighter, and swerving through traffic to send her flying across the slippery leather seats he nearly went off the road, rear ended a Volkswagon, and got hit by a semi.<p>

He was in hysterics, as she jumped from his truck and nearly kissed the ground.

Josh chuckled

"So...how was the drive?"

Ria sighed and drummed her fingers on the table, shifted her position in her seat, and ruffled her hair.

"Something on your mind sweetheart?"

She glanced at Phil and sighed again, perking up when she heard the sound of yelling. She leaned forward, eyes searching for the littlest deckhand. SHe finally found him at the top of the stack, yelling at Josh who was on deck. She grinned.

"You would never know those those two were brothers." Phil said, putting a cigarette in his mouth, and fishing around for his lighter. She laughed lightly.

"Mortal Enemies straight outta the womb. I personally think we should institute the boxing gloves. Who needs the movies when you can watch gruesome twosome beat the snot out of eachother?"

Phil chuckled, glancing at her from the corner of his eye. "You doin okay?"

She shrugged and nodded " No worse than usual...And the usual sucks so I'm good."

He rolled his eyes. "Im bein serious."

She turned to look at him, face set. "So am I...just ask my shrink."

Phil shook his head. "Get the hell outta my wheelhouse."

She grinned, eyes sparkling mischeviously and left the wheel house, her faint laughter drifting up the stairs as Phil turned back to the charts.

"Kids."

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><p>Ria was flying. She had the strangest sensation of being paralyzed in space, as a blurry shape in the distance grew closer and more clear. She opened her motuh and nothing came out. The blurry object had taken shape into a building. It drew closer and closer and she heard, as if far away, the echo of a scream.<p>

Ria let out a shriek and sat straight up, covered in cold sweat to find a very alarmed looking Jake sitting beside her.

"Ria." He said leaning forward to push her hair off her forehead "You okay?"

"Ba-Bad dream." She shuddered, and tried to blink away tears.

"About your sister?"

She nodded, tears spilling over her eyelids and rolling down her cheeks. He reached for her, pulling her into a tight hug.

"I miss her so much Jake."

"I know baby. I know."

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